i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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