it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I need water and some morals
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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