I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
