for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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