If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
