nut hugger
My brain says no but my pants say off.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
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