you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
