there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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