why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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