I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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