Grow some girl-balls and come out already
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
