I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize