it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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