i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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