Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
