my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
