There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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