well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Randomize
