I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
