epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Randomize
