Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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