yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
