he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
