Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
How external is "for external use only"?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
