Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
