she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
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