Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize