Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
