Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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