Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
