C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize