yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
