i think i have two assholes
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I just gift wrapped bread.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
