and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
