got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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