Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
