So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
