is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
