haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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