There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
