i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
