I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
