I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
