i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize