Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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