That's intense
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
