Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
