His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
