i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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