okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
